Awakened
by PinkBlossom789
Summary: This is the sequel to my oneshot "Shadow in the Moonlight," but it can be read on its own. Hisoka breaks into the Zoldyck manor again, and Illumi finds out something about Hisoka's past that changes everything. (Part 2 of the "Windows Left Ajar" series)


With the young heir turning eleven in less than twenty-four hours, everyone in the Zoldyck household seems to have lost their heads.

At the moment, Kikyo is on bed rest, trying to recover from screaming herself hoarse at every passing butler for four hours straight. Silva dragged Milluki with him to Toys R Us a few minutes ago, completely fed up with the butlers after they purchased a doll house and tea set for his preteen son. Zeno left the manor this morning, muttering something about fresh air, and hasn't been seen since. As for Killua, he's barricaded himself in his room, having gotten into some sort of argument with Kalluto again.

Speaking of Kalluto, it might do some good to check up on him. After all, he's prone to moping around lately, which is rather unbecoming of a Zoldyck.

Illumi passes several butlers on his way to his youngest brother's room, all of them scurrying around with blue streamers and party hats in their arms. Despite Killua's insistence that he currently despises the color blue, it appears that their mother is still determined to force it upon him.

Kalluto's door is ajar. Before his hand reaches the knob, he hears, "Hmm, how fascinating."

Illumi stills. That's the same voice that teases him during missions, the one that taunted him just last week before jumping from his window. This is a tranquil voice that vibrates with vivid color and sinister passion.

Illumi peers through the gap in the door to see Hisoka examining a blue teacup as though he's never seen anything like it before, holding it at eye level. Kalluto sits beside him on the carpet, carefully pouring imaginary tea into his own cup. In front of them are a kettle, tiny porcelain dishes, baby dolls, and stuffed animals.

"What's fascinating, Hisoka-san?" Illumi could shake his head right now at Kalluto's innocent words. His younger brother looks at Hisoka with puffy red eyes, his cheeks still tear-stained from his confrontation with Killua.

"Cobalt is one of my favorite shades of blue." Hisoka points to the cup, smiling. "It's remarkable, wouldn't you say?"

Kalluto furrows his brow in confusion, and Hisoka continues. "My, my, you must really build up your vocabulary, Kalluto-chan. After all," Hisoka's tone lowers, and he locks eyes with a still confused Kalluto, "this is the perfect age to learn as much as you can about _all sorts_ of things."

Anger snaps within Illumi like a rubber band. He understands the implication in Hisoka's words, even if Kalluto doesn't.

He thinks back to the information he learned about Hisoka three days ago.

On that day, Illumi was present while his grandfather interviewed a young woman, Aika Mori, for a butler position. Illumi's eyes were drawn to her the entire time, taking in the shoulder-length blonde hair that framed her face perfectly. Her gray eyes sparkled with good-hearted mischief, and Zeno was unable to keep a smile off his lips as she spoke. This Aika was a triple-star hunter, and knew how to tell a joke or two. It came as no surprise to Illumi that his grandfather hired her on the spot.

As she was about to walk out of the study, Zeno asked Illumi if he'd heard from Hisoka lately.

Aika froze where she stood. "Forgive me, but you wouldn't be talking about Hisoka Morow, would you?" The mere mention of Hisoka had seemed to transform her into an entirely different woman. She was completely still, her face drained of all color, her eyes drained of all sparkle.

Without any hesitation, Illumi used his pins to get the truth out of her.

At eleven years old, Aika moved to a wealthy area on the outskirts of Meteor City. While walking to her uncle's ice cream shop after school one day, she bumped into Hisoka.

He was the same age as her, handsome and neatly dressed, with night-colored hair and sun-colored eyes. He flirted endlessly with her, far too skilled at it for a boy his age - whispering into her ear as they walked to the shop together, even managing to kiss her on the cheek once.

Hisoka paid for both of their cones - strawberry for her, vanilla for him. Personality-wise, they were a good match, Hisoka rivaling her in wit and humor. By the end of what she assumed had been a date, they both had ice cream smeared all over their faces, and sprinkles in their hair, from goofing around.

Aika missed an important sign that day - Hisoka hadn't spoken a single word about himself.

After school the next day, she looked for Hisoka. He wasn't anywhere, and so she headed home, feeling all the while that she was being followed.

The same thing happened the next day.

And the next day.

Finally, on the fourth day, she saw Hisoka again.

That was when she noticed the look in his eyes. She brushed it off as a trick of the light.

The questions he asked were strange. "Do you ever think about running away?" "Is there anyone you care about?" "Don't you want to do something exciting, Aika?"

She didn't answer, and he stopped talking after a few moments.

His smiles weren't as genuine today. She felt uncomfortable, looking away while they walked to the shop again, feeling his roaming gaze. He grabbed her hand and pulled her closer to him as though she was his possession, his property.

They wound up in an alleyway, and before she knew it, she was on the ground, feeling like she were being electrocuted a thousand times over.

Hisoka had forcibly awakened her nen. "I knew you would be more powerful than me."

Standing over her, his graceful aura tangled with her unstable one. Even on the verge of entering a year-long coma, she couldn't mistake the look in his eyes now. He was ridden with maddening desperation, obsessive longing. "Do you want to run away with me, Aika?"

Illumi bursts into Kalluto's room.

"What gives you the right to be in here?" Illumi's monotone gives away none of what he feels, as he roughly grabs Hisoka's arm and pulls him off the floor. A weaker man than Hisoka would have a broken arm by now.

A mocking smile graces Hisoka's lips, the ones that bruised his a week ago. "Mm? Are you angry, Illumi?"

There he is, being his usual irritating self. It's as though he's forgotten their last encounter, no grudges held.

"Aniki?" Kalluto looks up at Illumi, and that's when he notices the floral-printed kimono. "Does Hisoka-san have to leave? We were playing."

Illumi turns back to Hisoka, his gaze focused on him as he speaks to Kalluto. "When he leaves, you will put on a different outfit and place these dolls in a box for Gotoh to toss out. The tea set, as well."

He's used to ignoring Kalluto whenever childish tears well up in his bright purple eyes. He doesn't need to look at his brother to know that that's the cause for all the sniffling. But it's never been Illumi's job to be nice.

Of course, Hisoka has a comment to make. "Now, now, Illu. Must you be so harsh?"

Illumi's grip tightens, and Hisoka's eyes light up in a way that Illumi never intended them to. "Why do you insist on staying where you are unwelcome?"

It's a genuine question, disguised as an insult. Maybe Hisoka can see through it. Maybe Hisoka knows that Illumi stared at his ceiling for hours on New Year's Eve, as though it would tell him why Hisoka had sought out his company that night. As though it would tell him why he hadn't tried irritating Machi instead, or Chrollo, or someone else entirely.

Hisoka presses a palm to his forehead, and Illumi watches with incredulity as he chuckles to himself. A laugh made of velvet, of silk, of everything that embodies comfort and seduction, wraps around him.

Hisoka finally speaks. "I came to ask for your help in picking a present for Killua. His birthday is tomorrow, isn't - ?"

Illumi strikes Hisoka across the face so quickly that he's not sure either of them saw it coming.

Even with a red mark on his porcelain skin, Hisoka's aura becomes saturated with unrestrained lust.

And all of it is directed toward Illumi.

He wants to throttle Hisoka and push him out of the window he climbed in through. Kalluto's witnessed worse things.

But his grandfather recommended Hisoka as an ally in the first place. There's no telling what he'll do if Illumi does anything to jeopardize that.

Illumi is never incapable of making decisions. But right now, he can only stare at Hisoka blankly, his fury escalating beneath the surface.

"Okay." Hisoka smoothens out his white pants and runs a hand through his periwinkle hair, eyes looking Illumi up and down as he does so. "I will leave now."

Illumi blinks. "You are leaving?"

"So indecisive. Is this not what you wanted, Illumi?" Hisoka raises an eyebrow as though Illumi is a foolish child, chiding him in a teasing manner. "I'm a good boy. I do as I'm told. Even in bed, if you cared to know."

Humming a light tune, Hisoka strolls out of Kalluto's room and into the hallway, shutting the door behind him.

"What does that mean, Aniki? Does he mean he follows the rules in bed by not tossing and turning too much?"

Illumi presses a hand to his head, feeling a migraine coming on. "Yes, something like that."

That god-awful clown. He must have known what he was doing by saying that in front of Kalluto. He must have thought it funny to awaken the boy's curiosity about things that nine-year-olds are better off not knowing.

It takes an entire hour for Illumi to deflect all of Kalluto's questions. But at least Illumi can relax now, knowing that he's successfully convinced him that babies do, in fact, come from storks. He's still not completely sure how the conversation got to that point, but at least it's over now.

He enters his room to check his cell phone . . .

And finds Hisoka lounging on the bed, looking through Illumi's phone.

Illumi snaps the door shut. "You said you were leaving."

"Yes. I left your brother's room." When met with silence, Hisoka glances up with a smirk. "Am I unwelcome in your room as well?"

Illumi says nothing, standing before the bed, his mind whirring.

A desperate and obsessive eleven-year-old stalker doesn't simply change his ways. Is Hisoka even more deranged now, as an adult, than he lets on? Does he intend to charm Killua and Kalluto the same way that he charmed Aika? To what end?

"You're so quiet now that your brother isn't around. When it's just the two of us" - Hisoka winks - "you're much calmer."

Illumi moves closer and snatches his phone from Hisoka's grasp. "You've been looking through my messages."

"Indeed. And it appears that you have no semblance of a love life." No one else has eyes like Hisoka's. They're like x-rays, scanning for secrets. Whenever he accompanies him on missions, those eyes are enough to make Illumi's targets run for their lives.

But Hisoka is inescapable. No one can truly run away from him. He'll always catch up to them in the end, his playing cards drenched in his victims' blood.

"I am not the heir. Such things are of no importance." A flashback creeps its way into his mind, and he quickly shoves it out before it can take over.

"Is that so?" Hisoka moves his gaze to the ceiling, elbows crossed behind his head as though he does this every day.

"There are things that are much more vital. Protecting my brothers, for instance." He steps closer to Hisoka, towering over him from the side of the bed, feeling inky black swirls of aura fester in the air around him. "If you have any intentions to harm them, I will kill you right here. Right now."

Hisoka sighs, as though Illumi is a tiresome child who doesn't want to eat his dinner. "Oh dear. What gives you the impression that I'd want to harm your brothers?"

"Don't lie to me!" Illumi doesn't remember the last person to make him raise his voice like this. Maybe it was Killua. "You climbed in through his window!"

Hisoka's smirk causes Illumi to shake in anger. "You're so oblivious that it hurts my heart." Hisoka leans toward him, so close that he can feel his breathy laughs hit his lips. A few more inches, and their mouths would meet if either of them cared to make it happen. "Kalluto told me everything."

"What the fuck are you talking about?" He's not sure when the last time he swore was, either. Hisoka deserves some awards for the records he's breaking.

"Kalluto is terrified of you."

Illumi isn't breathing anymore. At least it doesn't feel like he is.

The glimmer in Hisoka's eyes grows more and more wicked as the seconds tick by. "He told me about the time Killua ran away last year. No one knew where he was. And Kalluto confessed to you that he wanted to do the same. That he was bored of life as an assassin."

Hisoka runs a finger down Illumi's cheek, his breaths growing faster in twisted excitement. "As soon as he said that, he found himself being nearly drowned to death by his dear aniki. Kalluto would have died if your grandfather hadn't intervened at the last second. So, Illumi. Tell me who the bigger threat to your brothers is. You or me?"

All the air has been drained from Illumi's lungs. He's certain of it.

He still wakes up in the middle of the night, with thoughts of enjoying the pain he inflicted on Kalluto that day. And it terrifies him, fills him with emotions that go far beyond regret and disgust.

"Why so quiet?" Hisoka's breaths rustle Illumi's hair, and there's something more than mockery or glee or desire in his expression. "This is how you react when you're proven to be a hypocrite, hmm?"

Judgment. Hisoka's irises are intense with accusation as they fixate on Illumi. Hisoka must disapprove of Illumi, seeing him as weak for losing control with his brother like that. Maybe Hisoka will stop assisting him with missions, feeling that Illumi is beneath him.

Illumi's panic gives way to rage. Hisoka, of all people, thinks of him as a hypocrite.

"I know about Aika." Hisoka looks alarmed at the evil smile Illumi can feel forming on his lips. Two can play at this game of unveiling the other's secrets.

Hisoka's aura is a dark purple, spilling through the air in chaotic tendrils. "I was a tad foolish at Killua's age. I sometimes laugh looking back on the things I did as a child." Oh, his voice is so calm. His face is composed, but his yellow orbs are daggers.

"Really? Do you laugh about how unlovable you were, too?"

It happens in a split second. A joker card is held at his neck, making shallow cuts. His scalp stings with pain as Hisoka grabs a fistful of it and tugs Illumi's head backwards.

"Illumi, you're one to talk." Hisoka's voice is harsh. No more playfulness. Just vindictiveness. "People only tolerate you. I, for instance, am only here because you're pretty enough to suit my tastes. Don't think that I consider you particularly special."

Hisoka lets go of his hair and pulls the card away.

The rejection burns, tears at Illumi's heart. But the panic of Hisoka leaving is worse. Hisoka may never come back if he leaves now.

And Illumi will be left all alone, with Killua slamming doors in his face and Kalluto weeping late into the night when the pressure of being a Zoldyck becomes too much.

Hisoka's blue hair contrasts strangely with his porcelain skin, but it suits him somehow. The sharp angles of his face are difficult to look away from, and his lips . . .

Illumi leans forward, and Hisoka stills when Illumi presses his lips to his with force.

What will he do? Push him away? Kiss him back?

He does neither, pushing on Illumi's shoulders until he's on top of him, looking down at him with an unreadable expression.

Hisoka is hard and throbbing against Illumi's thigh, and that only catapults Illumi's senses to infinity.

But when he pulls Hisoka's hand to his zipper, Hisoka laughs to himself.

"Just kidding." Hisoka whispers the words into Illumi's ear like a lover. Illumi grips Hisoka's shoulder in disbelief, claws at it. "You don't even know what you're doing, do you?"

Hisoka's breaths are as uneven and filled with longing as Illumi's, but he somehow forces himself up and off the bed.

Illumi doesn't run after him.

Instead, he simply lies there, body aching with want, while Hisoka jumps out of his window once more.

….

**Thanks for reading! There is now a sequel oneshot to this called "Like Ice," which can be found at s/13553961/1/Like-Ice**


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